Saturday 3 December 2022

We stood on the hills, Lady

The Shepherd’s Carol (1945)

Clive Sansom

We stood on the hills, Lady,
Our day’s work done,
Watching the frosted meadows
That winter had won.

The evening was calm, Lady,
The air so still.
Silence more lovely than music
Folded the hill.

There was a star, Lady,
Shone in the night,
Larger than Venus it was
And bright, so bright.

Oh, a voice from the sky, Lady,
It seemed to us then
Telling of God being born
In the world of men.

And so we have come, Lady,
Our day’s work done.
Our love, our hopes, ourselves
We give to your son.

Monday 30 May 2022

Letty's Globe

When Letty had scarce pass’d her third glad year,
 And her young artless words began to flow,
One day we gave the child a colour’d sphere
 Of the wide earth, that she might mark and know,
By tint and outline, all its sea and land.
 She patted all the world; old empires peep’d
Between her baby fingers; her soft hand
 Was welcome at all frontiers. How she leap’d,
 And laugh’d and prattled in her world-wide bliss;
But when we turn’d her sweet unlearnèd eye
On our own isle, she raised a joyous cry—
‘Oh! yes, I see it, Letty’s home is there!’
 And while she hid all England with a kiss
Bright over Europe fell her golden hair.


Charles Tennyson Turner



Saturday 16 April 2022

Farting for Health

Rosy was looking at our old copy of 'Alternative London' and told me she'd found a section on Fasting. I misheard her. Here is the section, if I'd been correct.

Farting

'Your body is your temple, respect it and what you put into it. Purify it by farting.'

How long you decide to fart for, or why, is purely a personal matter and should be based on the knowledge you have of your own state of health, mind, and capacity for endurance. It is important to know also how to break a fart - traditionally a meat-eater should break it on vegetables, and a vegetarian should break it on fruit. If you feel strong enough you should try to take some exercise. It can be dangerous to fart suddenly without anyone to help you, and you should purify your body first by eating good foods.

Farting is nature's way of healing but it is not a 'cure-all' for every known ailment. Total farting makes it possible for nature to remove and expel foreign matter and disease-producing wastes from the body.

A traditional farting drink is lemon juice mixed with honey.

Friday 15 April 2022

How to Get On in Society

 by John Betjeman

Phone for the fish knives, Norman
As cook is a little unnerved;
You kiddies have crumpled the serviettes
And I must have things daintily served.

Are the requisites all in the toilet?
The frills round the cutlets can wait
Till the girl has replenished the cruets
And switched on the logs in the grate.

It's ever so close in the lounge dear,
But the vestibule's comfy for tea
And Howard is riding on horseback
So do come and take some with me

Now here is a fork for your pastries
And do use the couch for your feet;
I know what I wanted to ask you-
Is trifle sufficient for sweet?

Milk and then just as it comes dear?
I'm afraid the preserve's full of stones;
Beg pardon, I'm soiling the doileys
With afternoon tea-cakes and scones.

Saturday 5 February 2022

On a 69th birthday

 Loveliest of trees, the cherry now
Is hung with bloom along the bough,
And stands about the woodland ride
Wearing white for Eastertide.


Now, of my threescore years and ten,
Sixty-nine won't come again,
And take from seventy springs that score,
It only leaves me just one more.

And since to look at things in bloom
A single spring is little room,
About the woodlands I will go
To see the cherry hung with snow.

Acknowledging A E Housman